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Showing posts from June, 2015

Sharing this here because I don't want to forget this.

Sheryl Sandberg with Dave Goldberg Today is the end of sheloshim for my beloved husband—the first thirty days. Judaism calls for a period of intense mourning known as shiva that lasts seven days after a loved one is buried. After shiva, most normal activities can be resumed, but it is the end of sheloshim that marks the completion of religious mourning for a spouse. A childhood friend of mine who is now a rabbi recently told me that the most powerful one-line prayer he has ever read is: “Let me not die while I am still alive.” I would have never understood that prayer before losing Dave. Now I do. I think when tragedy occurs, it presents a choice. You can give in to the void, the emptiness that fills your heart, your lungs, constricts your ability to think or even breathe. Or you can try to find meaning. These past thirty days, I have spent many of my moments lost in that void. And I know that many future moments will be consumed by the vast emptiness as well. But when I can, I want t…

The one where I have a boyfriend

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So, there's this. 
I know. I've not posted much on this blog as of late. 
For many reasons.....
But for those who've been reading this blog since 2007 (can you believe I've been blogging that long?!) I thought I'd give a little update. And the name of that update is Jordan. :)
Questions? Ask away!

The one with a countdown.

My journal looked a bit like this today:8 days til I finish Whole30.7 days til my boyfriend gets back in town. (yes. more on that later.)10 days til I'm at the lake. You guys know how I feel about the lake.25 days until my surgery. (more on that later, too?) There is a lot happening. A lot of change. A lot of counting down. A lot of stuff. 
And then I realized I'd written June 1 at the top of my journal. We're six months in to 2015 and I'm counting down to different events. 
When we count down or cross days off our calendar in anticipation for upcoming events, do we end up making less of our present day time, our present day events?
I feel as though I'm guilty of that the past month. 
There has been a lot of 'new' in 2015 for me. (ie: that 2nd bullet up there.)
One thing I've learned about myself is that I'm not the most adaptable person. Change is not my favorite. Plenty of people in my life are probably reading that statement and thinking "um…